It was a weekend of a festive season, a very busy day at work for me. Two medical officers holding the fort of the entire Emergency Department (ED) for 24 hours along with my comrade of nurses, medical assistances and porters.
Patients pouring in ceaselessly, we were all hungry and exhausted. As I was wondering if I could squeeze in some time for a quick meal and a tinkle in the loo, the bell from red zone went off. Okay, maybe later.
Twelve hours past, I could finally catch a breather and that is when I see a familiar face peeping into the door of Yellow Zone. She was a regular patient in ED. In her early sixties, her heart is faulty with occasional bouts of palpitations but her problematic heart is also gentle and kind.
She would always ask if we have had our meals, remember us by our names and asking about our families. She frequents the emergency department almost on a weekly basis (double checking her blood pressure, mild headache, palpitations, unable to sleep well at night) just to make sure that she is doing all right. We do not mind, she was a lovely lady.
But remember, busy weekend and ED filled beyond it’s capacity. I was an exhausted miserable soul with a tired mind, empty stomach and a bladder full of urine. When I saw her i got frustrated and thought to myself “Come on, not today! ”
She started waving when she saw me. I walked over, opened the door and I am pretty sure that I did not look friendly. She stood smiling with two food containers in hands and said “You guys must be hungry, here is something for dinner!” I stood there receiving the food, feeling so ashamed of myself.
Half a decade of my early twenties dedicated to medical school. We learned all about the human body from the cellular unit to organs and systems, how they function, how to diagnose and how to treat. After hundreds of classes, lectures and rotations, not a single class dedicated to help us learn and build our emotional skills.
I never learned the importance of self awareness and self regulation. How to stay calm when emotions are running high. How to make better decisions when your mind is fuzzy and heart is heavy. How to smile (genuinely) when you are so tired and hungry that your facial muscles have gone into paralysis.
The mountain loads of work and exhaustion clouded my mind. My patient came like a ray of sunshine to my gloomy day, treated me with a dose of kindness and the best beef rendang I had in my life. That day, my patient became my doctor and teacher.
Since then, I will always remember to add a little dose of kindness into my treatment plan or prescription.
“Kindness is the highest form of intelligence.” -Wayne Teasdale-
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